The Spotlight Effect

When I work with student-athletes 1-on-1 or through our Leadership Academy so many of them worry A LOT about what other people think about them. I often ask “Do your really believe that other people think that much about you in the first place?” Then I share with them about the SPOTLIGHT EFFECT.

The SPOTLIGHT EFFECT is a common psychological phenomenon where we overestimate the degree to which other people are noticing or observing our actions, behaviors, appearance, or results. We think everyone is staring and noticing us, but they aren’t. Even if they are, they quickly forget about it. While we are the “main character” in our own life, we are not the main character in our small world at large. While we may but the spotlight on ourselves, it would be pretty self-centered to believe that everyone else is also putting the spotlight on us.

Psychologists suggest the following three methods to help dim the spotlight you are feeling:

1. AWARENESS: Understand that others are never as tuned into your actions, behaviors, or appearance as you are. Just take a look around the next time you are out and about, realize that you are going to have to work really hard to get most people’s attention away from their phone to notice you!

2. BE INTERESTED: In any public situation, ask questions, listen intently, and engage. This eases your own tension, gets others talking and builds up your confidence in a new social situation. If people are going to notice you, give them a good reason to by being engaging.

3. “SO WHAT?” APPROACH: Ask “So what?” about that worst fear becoming reality. Usually the “so what?” isn’t nearly as bad as we think.

Watch the video below to learn more about the SPOTLIGHT EFFECT.

JOURNAL ACTIVITY

In what situations do you feel the impact of the SPOTLIGHT EFFECT?

How do you see it impacting you in those environments?

Which dimming technique could help you in that situation?